Day Zero

Back Dating 

June 6, 2018.

At 4am, we had all stayed up late because of how bad my pain had been that day. We knew if we went to bed at 11pm or 12am, I'd have just lain there in pain for hours staring at the ceiling. Also, if we had gone to bed then, we would of been groggy and wearing ear plugs during the explosion.

So we stayed up and watched bake off until we were pretty convinced I was going to pass out in the next few hours.

We cleaned up the kitchen, did the house rounds, I nose booped my little baby Thor(Kitten, 8 months old), he went to sleep in his cave (a large cat carrier a rounded by boxes, we only moved in late February after having a homelessness scared that started mid December. 2 of us are pretty severely disabled  so we unpacked everything important and then moved at a slower pace as we slowly recovered from the exhausting  painful experience of moving.)

Loki (Border Collie, 4 Years, 4 Months) was curled up on my legs and the 3 of us were winding down in bed..

I had just put my face mask on  when this allmighty noise came out of no where. It was like a BANG WHOOSH CRASH. At first my heart jumped into my throat, I thought the shed had collapsed, which is where Gwenie lived, our 2 year old giant continental rabbit lives. As I looked out of the window though everything was fine.. That was when the fire alarm started.

From here on, I don't know how I did what I did. For clarification  on a good day, standing for a few minutes without my crutches exhausts me, and due to a nerve issue in my legs, creates an 'itch' in my feet that is painful, plus  my legs just hurt anyway. On crutches I can last a little longer, generally, I rely on a wheelchair.

Ness ran to the hall where the living room door was blasted towards us, me and Anthony vaulted over this door. I was thinking of nothing but Thor. I don't wear slippers and I was just in shorts and a tshirt. 2 of our fish tanks where smashed. I had several deep cuts on my feet that I discovered in the hospital later, some I likely got then.. The kitchen ceiling was partially on the floor, there were 2 small fires. The kitchen door to the garden was somewhere in the garden too.. The windows were gone, when I exited the kitchen into the garden I could see the wall was bowed out.

I couldn't search for Thor with the fires going, Ness called 911 whilst Anthony went to get trousers... After discovering the electric was out, I put it the fire with a towel and a saucepan. The person talking to be was telling got us to leave, Ness was trapped in that hallway, unable to vault the door like the 2 disabled people! I was searching for the cat, I was smashing back and forwards on ceiling, but I stayed up, the pain was like a roar in the back of my head. I put out the fires in time for a fireman to poke his head through a window, I'd been searching for Thor in between my efforts. After the fire was gone  my legs just gave way, I remember screaming into Anthony's shoulder "Why?"

It took a few minutes for the fireman to coax me out. I staggered around the glass filled garden calling for Thor. The fireman caught me and half lead, half dragged me to the front of the house where I was deposited in my chair.

From here on, I know what I was told, because I shut down. I was just staring off into the busy road in front of my house, praying Thor would not find his way there. Anytime a question was asked at me, I just started crying. A neighbour bought us duvets which was good as it was gold for Anthony and Ness. I felt nothing. Idly I say my legs were bleeding in multiple locations but I couldn't feel it. Eventually me and Anthony were carted off to hospital, Ness being the healthiest of our number stayed behind with Loki.

We stayed in hospital till about 1 or 2 I think, I was... Distant still. At some pont a nurse asked us if we were having problems at home because our house was messy. Personally, I think if your house doesn't look messy when the ceiling is on the floor, you have a weird house. They gave us an ambulance ride to Riverside, the library, gp and housing, welfare advice etc. All in 1 big building. By this point I had fashioned a skirt from a hospital blanket as I don't really like walking around in shorts. They gave us a room to rest in whilst they found us a temporary flat, I curled up on the floor using the devet the neighbour gave me for a mat. They also gave me an apple I slowly nibbled at and a bottle of water. We used the library computer to update my sister as we didn't have phones, we also took some books out. My gp got us an emergency appointment to get all of mine and Anthony's scripts (nearly 30 all together.)

They collected clothes from the redcross, bags of food and bathroom basics etc. Then we were popped in a taxi and sent away. The house had 3 single beds, a 2 seater sofa, kettle, microwave, a 2 plate electric hob thing, then 3 plates, 3 cups, 3 forks, 3 knives... You get the idea.

A friend came and delivered us a can opener, and brown fizzy pop which is the current source  of my energy. He also ran to 7 pharmacies to collect our meds, some still were missing.. Whilst he was out, we changed into the redcross clothes, shivering as the heating did not work, no hot water either, we squished together in the bed, shivering  fully clothed, Loki curled un on my legs looks sad as his brother was not here. I prayed that Thor found a place that was warm and safe to sleep. I prayed that Integra, my corn snake was safe in her vivarium and that Gwenie was safe in the shed. That our poor fish didn't die painfully and the ones in the tank that wasn't smashed passed peacefully as no energy would be going into the house.

This, however was just the start and we were soon to discover that the worst part of your house exploding is the bit that comes after.

• I will include in these updates the Facebook posts we did at the time.